How to Cope with Heartbreak and Move on After Breakup

The word “heartbreak”, brings to mind the feeling of pain and loss associated with a breakup (of a romantic relationship). However, several things can lead to heartbreak, including the death of a loved one. 

Our central focus in this context is the heartbreak that follows after a romantic relationship has come to an end.

Heartbreak sounds just like an ordinary word for some people, but for those who have experienced it, it is not a mere word to joke with.

Heartbreak can cause great pain that is sometimes more unbearable than physical injuries. This is because heartbreak affects an individual’s emotions and temperament. Hence, it comes with emotional and psychological anomalies, stress, dejection, and a sense of grief.

Most people had experienced heartbreak at some point in their lives. The majority of heartbroken people often recover over time. Unfortunately, some heartbreak can lead to depression, sickness, and even loss of life.

The intense pain associated with heartbreak is proportional to the level of seriousness in the relationship before it collapsed. Also, people who were more sincere in the relationship suffered the greatest pain after the entire drama.

Below are tips on how to cope with heartbreak, recover from it and move on after the breakup.

1. Accept your fate and the fact that the relationship has finally come to an end:

It looks like a dream, right? A few minutes ago, you were laughing, playing, talking, and feeling each other like love birds. A few hours later, “It is over” or “We can no longer continue this relationship”.

It is hard to accept that the person you once had the deepest intimacy with and sometimes fantasizing about an imaginary future together is no more going to be there by your side. This is the end of all the dreams, plans, and good times you had together.

The truth is that there is nothing you can do to turn back the hands of time. You have to accept your fate and the fact that the relationship has come to an end.

There might be a moment you would not believe this is happening to you, but it is you. Once you accept that the relationship is no more, it will create a chance within your heart for expression and immediate consolation.

2. Burst out all your feelings:

It helps to burst out your feelings after heartbreak. If you feel like crying, do it. Remember all the good times you had with the person and what you are going to miss. Let the pain come in full in a way that can make you cry out everything in you.

If it takes you weeks to cry to forget about that relationship, do it. But remember that your health matters. Prolonged grief can affect your health.

Bursting out your pains in form of crying will help you recover easily. This is because after crying it all, there is a level you will get tired of your tears and dry them up by yourself.

Once there is nothing else to cry about, your body will automatically undergo a self-consolation process, which would help you get loosed from the pains of the heartbreak.

3. Change your perspective about the lost relationship:

Everyone has both good and bad behaviors. If you keep remembering the good times you had in the relationship, the kindness you received, and the beauty of your lost relationship, it might cause you more pain. Of course, thoughts has a great influence in your life, character and lifestyle. By changing your mindset toward the lost relationship, you can easily recover.

Think about how he/she once shouted at you. Remember that airtime and money they made you spend unnecessary. Think about the disturbances and the distractions you endured.

Imagine you dedicated that money, time, and data to learn a skill. Consider that you are now free from it all. Let that freedom reverberate in your soul and give you reasons to rise and move on to the bright future that awaits you.

4. Erase all memories:

It is hard to remember or visualize all the good times you had without feeling bad about it. Delete and erase anything that can bring back the memory you had with that person.

Go through your inbox, email, and book shelf, and delete all the good messages you sent to each other. If you can’t still bear it, tear and burn away the pictures you took together.

Anything that causes you pain should not be around you. You are worth more than anything that would want to destroy your feelings. Once you have the mind to do these, you would realize that you will get over it and move on.

5. Avoid the person that broke your heart for some time:

Try to stay away from the person that broke your heart. If you live close to each other, and there is no way you would not see each other, then avoid eye contact.

Give the person a distance and do not allow any conversation between you for some time. Do not even exchange greetings. Even if you feel like greeting him/her, hold yourself for some time. This is to stop you from getting into a deep conversation again that might make you remember your pains.

Do not chat with him/her for a while. Even if you are to chat, let your conversation be neutral, but we advise that you avoid any of such closeness until you fully recover from the heartbreak.

6. Disconnect from each other:

You were once so close and so deep into each other. You created time to chat and visit each other but this should no longer have a place.

After the breakup, disconnect drastically. Many people who break your heart would claim that they want you to still be there. Say “No” to such a trap. You should not be where you are not needed. If he/she needed you to be there, they would have kept you in their life.

The other person may not feel the pain as you do. Your being there is only for his/her happiness, not for any gain on your side. Even if you are to connect again, it can be years later, but why does that matter? Now is a time for you to recover.

If seeing their number on your phone makes you feel bad, delete the contact. You can block them on social media if the pain is too much. But let some of your actions be temporary. You are not enemies; you are just people who do not share anything in common anymore.

7. Avoid being alone after heartbreak:

Loneliness can worsen your heartbreak and associated conditions. Go outdoors and engage in social activities: Go to places you like and socialize with others. Attend a birthday party, sporting events, music concerts, games, and competitions that can make you forget what you have lost.

You can visit friends, families or loved ones to have a good conversation and a nice time with them.

Once you are happy, you will be able to move on. The passion you derive from social activities plagues the pains of your heartbreak.

8. Make new friends and connections:

You have just lost a great connection. Making new friends would make you have a feeling of acceptance from the rejection you last had. New friendship often comes with good times and joyful outings and amazing conversations.

New friends would boost your positive vibes and give you a sense of hope and a new beginning. But ensure that your new friends are those who are optimistic. You do not need people who would ruin your life or worsen your feelings.

Moreover, it is not advisable to rush into a new relationship immediately after the breakup. It can be dangerous to your body and mind.

9. Keep yourself busy:

You would not always be outdoors. After mingling with friends and socializing with others, you are still going back home.

“An idle mind is the devil’s workshop”.

Staying idle would bring you bad and lazy feelings. You need to get yourself busy at home. Eat well, exercise, watch movies (but not love movies), play games, read, write and jump around with your pet (if you have any). By keeping yourself busy, you are already helping your mind to move on from thinking about your heartbreak.

Also, begin your day with activities that can help you feel positive all the time. Positive emotions can blend up other aspect of your emotional downturn.

10. Share your experience with someone:

It is heavy to bear that pain alone. Isolated feelings can kill. Do you have a friend, family, or anyone very close to you? Do not think about the shame. There is nothing shameful in having heartbreak. Anyone can be a victim, even the strongest can fall.

Draw close to someone and tell them what you are going through. By sharing with them, you would be much relieved from your emotional burden. Besides, many people will have some words of advice to strengthen you.

If for any reason there is no one to share your feelings with, speak to a child or your pet. This may sound funny but our minds can work wonders. Look at your pet eyeballs to eyeballs and tell it what had just happened to you. Of course, the pet would not help anything to say to you, but you have at least expressed your feelings.

That your heartbreak had taken you this far would even give you a reason to rethink yourself and how to move on from such a mess.

11. Take good care of yourself much better than before:

Go out shopping, and buy stuff that can make you happy. Eat well and treat yourself much more than anyone else would.

Shower yourself with love like no other. You will realize that you can be on your own without anyone being there by your side. Learning to be alone and stand by yourself helps to boost your self-confidence and optimism.

12. Think about how to become a better person:

People reject you not because you are inferior or worthless. However, some leave because of your low-income status, your economic class, and more.

If that is the case, then work to upgrade yourself so that you will feel much better than the former you.

When someone breaks your heart, do not feel rejected or that your world has come to an end, instead, see it as an opportunity for you to move to a higher level.

Work on yourself, I mean, harder, so that you would have the reason not to think the person meant anything in your life. Once your level is higher, even that person that rejected you would wish he/she never left.

13. Move on completely:

Nothing last forever. The relationship has come to an end. Move on completely. I mean, do not keep malice or plan any evil against him/her.

That it has ended simply means that both of you were not meant to be together. You have had your best time with each other. You have faced all the pains of heartbreak, now is the time to girdle up and plan a new life for yourself and the future you are about to see.

Do not allow the failed relationship and the pain the heartbreak inflicted on you to affect your personal life, your relationship with others, and your future romantic life.

In conclusion, heartbreak is not the end of your life. It means you have a better person somewhere waiting for you. The world has a population of over 8 billion. There are multi-billion people out there seeking not only love but someone with your qualities. Therefore, do not allow the pain of heartbreak to let you down. You have a better time ahead. Think and plan about that time.